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October 4 - The United States continues its relentless holy crusade to banish evil. Hot on the heels of the government's Unlawful Internet Gambling Enforcement Act comes the news that a Georgia county board of Education has been asked to ban the Harry Potter books from its schools.
The petition was brought by a concerned mother of four, Laura Mallory, who claims that the books are not only un-Christian but attempt to convert the impressionable children of the city of Atlanta to the Wicca religion, which as we all know is a mere hop skip and a jump from worshipping Satan.
God knows it's a helluva tricky choice to decide which is the greater evil - playing online poker or reading a Harry Potter novel.
The former enables adults to exercise freedom of choice indulging in the kind of civil liberties that people from the state of Georgia have traditionally spent hundreds of years lynching by the light of a merrily glowing cross.
The latter teaches children a fundamental system of morality and ethics that embraces the ideologies of many religious teachings without being overtly religious or preachy in any way. But these sinister books also show children thinking for themselves, exercising free will, and relying on their own abilities instead of the power of prayer, and that clearly will not do.
If Americans are allowed to gamble online and read books that are not wholesomely Christian (for all you grammar fans out there those last two words are known as an "oxymoron") who will don the Kevlar shield of Christ and venture into the Holy Land to slaughter those Iraqi infidels? Chaos will ensue if we do not protect American democracy and freedom by taking away the democracy and freedom of Americans. You may need to read that last sentence over again, but the US government assures you that it is in your best interests to move to the next paragraph.
Now is not the time for Americans to consider what is happening to them. Why start thinking now when things are already going so well! Just remember to exercise your inalienable right to apathy when the next series of elections roll around - don't bother voting because it is way too late for that. The damage has been done.
Once Bush Jr. signs the Act that will remove your right to play poker online, gamble at an online casino, or bet on sports over the Internet, perhaps we can all celebrate by attending a book burning in Georgia of all Satanist literature that features witches, minorities, and other subversive types.
End the terror today - ban online gambling, ban Harry Potter, and let's at least consider banning all thought, it's just so much easier that way.
Related Gambling Articles:
- Online Poker Room To Host NFL Tournaments - 10-05-06
- NFL Free Pick For Week 5 And Latest Betting News - 10-05-06
- Players Asked To Speak Out Against Online Gambling Ban - 10-05-06
- Online Casino Sites That Have Pulled Out Of The US - 10-05-06
- US Online Poker Update - Who Stays and Who Goes - 10-04-06
- Playtech Online Casino Sites To Block US Residents - 10-03-06
- Online Gambling Giants Shut Door On US Players - 10-03-06
- Monday Night Football Packers At Eagles Free NFL Pick - 10-02-06
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